Brief Update

I know I haven't blogged in about a century, and for that I apologize. But dont blame me, blame the ravenous hoards that crowd my office everyday. Remember all that cocky business this summer about not caring that I get payed like a burger flipper because I get to leave work at 4 and craft things and run around under a rainbow? Well, now that school is in Im here til around 9. Still getting payed like a burger flipper. But one who doesnt come home smelling as delicious.

Either way, nothing interesting was happening in my life as I am old and boring and have an intimate relationship with cable and the left cushion of my couch. But today, an event worthy of a post, if not a police report. Remember that condom bowl in my office? The freaking cute one I used to validate my existence and show the kids how hip I am?

Well Im not hip to thievery! Because today, when I walked into my office, I saw that my coffee table was unusually littered. And that was because someone has swiped my bowl! My bowl! My adorable condom bowl. Stolen. And to give an additional kick to the shins, the bastard dumped all the condoms out. Because not only is this sociopath a bowl-swiper, but they hate safe sex too.